Wednesday, November 23, 2005

When ordering SLC Punk...

Don't. It's a pain in the ass. After almost two weeks of sitting in limbo, trying to find out what was going on with my cancelled order, I finally called Overstock.com and talked to some sweetheart of a guy who didn't have the foggiest idea what was going on. I so badly wanted to get transferred to a higher up so I could rip them a new asshole, but instead, I had to talk to some kid who's probably in high school still. I just didn't have the heart to tell him to eat shit and live. So, I should have had a copy of SLC Punk that I was going to give away as a belated birthday/early Christmas present by now, but I don't. Instead, I have a $10 coupon to use Overstock.com's shitty service again. I figured I'll buy something that's about $8 and with the shipping, I'll be able to get it for free.

Luckily, the order got cancelled because the person I was ordering it for has decided that I'm a loser apparently. I'm used to that, but I always figured she was different. Oh well, what else would you expect from me? That a girl would actually think I'm pretty swell? Yeah right. There's a reason I'm single. I don't know what that reason is, but I'm pretty sure that vaginas are allergic to me. Or, maybe I am, in fact, a huge fucking loser and no one's had the heart to put me out of my misery. What do I know? Apparently, a whole lot of nothing.

Which sucks, because this girl seemed to be pretty rad. I thought that she was different than most girls. I guess I was wrong. Or maybe I was right and I'm wrong now. How the fuck should I know? I do know one thing...

Tomorrow is Turkey Day and I'm going to eat until I puke. Then I'm going to eat some more. Then, if I'm lucky, I'll eat some more. I'm fat. Might as well get fatter. But, on top of that, I'll get to see some of my friends. And, if there's anything at all playing at the movies, I'll be seeing it. It's kind of a tradition started back when Gib and Russ first started driving. They went to a movie on Christmas night. I started going the next year and we have yet to miss our yearly tradition. Except for the one year that all of the movie projectors broke... at the same time. They all broke just before the last movie was about to play. We thought it was odd. No big deal. We only almost died twice on the way down.

Just thinking about that night gets me pretty bummed, but in a happy way. I mean, I love to think back on the very boring, yet very fun and stuipd nights we used to have. Now everyone's moved away and thinking about those nights gets me bummed as all hell because I'll never have nights as good as those. Plus, throw in the fact that most of my friends, and by most I mean all, have moved way out of town. I'm lucky if I get to see any of those bastards more than once every three or four months. It sucks. Luckily, people around here are fucking awesome.

And I always get asked "You mean you don't have any friends around town?" and the answer is pretty much "Nope!" I mean, there are people around here that are super cool, but would I consider them my friends? Hardly not. It's hard to hang with people when they spend the majority of their free time at a bar. Sorry, but I just don't roll like that. Bars are my kryptonite. But, even when things are going down outside of bars, I tend not to get invited and understandably so. It's just a bummer, that's all. And I'm not allowed to drink anymore since I tried drinking myself to death a few weeks ago. But, there's no need to worry about me, at least until Valentine's Day. Of course, I might extend my suicide date to sometime in April because NOFX is playing in Cleveland in March. I needs to see that. So, I might be sticking around until springtime. Lucky me.

Seriously, old Metallica is fucking awesome!!!

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